Friday, December 9, 2011

SPS: Pink Triangle Prank

Pink Triangle Prank

Your son and his friends joke constantly that the new boy at school acts “so gay.” Today you learned that someone painted a pink triangle on his locker. You mentioned this to your son and he smiled slyly, saying, “Isn’t a pink triangle a gay pride thing?” The other moms say, “What’s the big deal?”

What Would YOU Do?

This SPS is one of the most hotly-debated Sticky Parenting Situations in The Mom Quiz. In our e-book we offer 4 possible responses, from searching your son's belongings for pink paint (and, if you find some, washing the evidence immediately) to organizing a meeting for parents who want to stop bullying. Vote for one of our abbreviated answers in our survey (look to the right)! 

Follow-up questions that readers have asked:

What if you do find pink paint on your son's clothes. Are you willing to let him be suspended from school? 

How guilty will you feel if you say nothing, the bullying continues, and the boy harms himself?

Post a comment and let us know what you think!

6 comments:

  1. Hi Moms!

    I think I'd search the backpack, confront the child, and then meet with the counselor. Definitely stand by suspension if it was called for, followed by restitution and good teaching.

    That's what I think I'd do...

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  2. I like your answer a lot, Lorie Ann: but what if you find that your son was only "dragged into it," and what if a suspension on his record will ruin his college (and even scholarship) chances? Would you still be willing to take a stand?

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  3. I agree with Lorie Ann. But would hope my son confessed to me what he did and not find it necessary to search the back pack. Kids need to learn early on that there are consequences to the actions they take. Sure it would be worry some to get a bad record in HS but we would all be in a worse situation and an unforgivable one if the boy harmed himself in any way because the bullying continued.

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  4. I wanted a fifth choice for the vote, which would be: Have a heart to heart talk with my son about the incident and find out if he was in any way involved.

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  5. Dear Anonymous: Excellent answer--and this is exactly what we hope, that The Mom Quiz will be a starting point spurring parents to come up with their own variations on answers (that work for you)!

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  6. I would definitely confront my child to learn more about his involvement. I realize the level of support can vary from city to town, (and I come from a small town where the tolerance for anything "different" is low). Thankfully we live in a large city where I know we can count on the school counselor and other parents to do the same with their children. Maybe even a group of parents come together to discuss an approach and form of consequence that is consistent. The most important thing is for parents to get as involved as possible, given the horrendous bullying that can happen now via text messaging and facebook...

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